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Scare the Bejeebers Out of Your Friends!

October 28, 2010

Halloween is fast approaching, meaning that it is the time of the year that kids and adults delight in scaring themselves silly. Perhaps there is someone that you would like to scare the bejeebers out of, but the traditional scary movie or overpriced haunted house just isn’t cutting it. This brief guide will hopefully provide some inspiration in the time old tradition of the scare.

Disclaimer: I take no responsibility for the consequences of implementing any ideas in this article. Carry them out at your own risk.

As any horror movie will teach you, it is important to build suspense prior to the “big scare.” Thus I will first list methods of unnerving those that you wish to scare.

-Suspense Builders-

The director’s cut: The next time your friend wants to watch a scary movie, pick it up the day before, rip it to your computer, and insert single frames of your friend’s face during scary parts. Switch it with the real DVD before you watch it the next night, and maintain composure as double take through the entire movie. Something is unnerving about a single frame upsetting the flow of a movie, but if that single frame is of your own face the result can be absolutely terrifying!

The doorstep knife: Simple yet effective. Head to your local thrift shop and pick up the largest butcher’s knife you can find. The next time your friend is out, simply leave it on their doorstep. I guarantee they will check every room and closet once they are inside.

The hang up: It’s a clichéd classic, but effective nevertheless. Get a phone with an unknown number (or block your number from appearing) and call your friend several times. Each time they answer, immediately hang up. For added effect, make sure you breath once audibly prior to ending the call.

So they are feeling uneasy, now it’s time to go for the money shot. Here are a few options.

-Big Scares-

The kidnap: No, don’t fake kidnap them (unless you would enjoy a misdemeanor charge.) Arrange for a couple of masked figures to come out and kidnap you just as you exit a movie theater or restaurant with your friend. The “crooks” grab you, throw you in the back of a car, and drive off. (Caveat: Make sure that your friend doesn’t have access to a phone, or else the likelihood of a panicked 911 call is high.)

The Bigfoot: With the low prices of gorilla costume rentals, I cannot understand why there aren’t more fake Bigfoot films! Rent a gorilla costume from your local costume shop, then go to a wooded area for a hot dog roast or camp out. Once the mood is right, have an accomplice (in the “Bigfoot costume”) rattle bushes, walk around in the shadows, and eventually “attack.” An added bonus of this scare is that you can secretly film the ordeal and submit it to a tabloid newspaper claiming it’s the real thing.

The hire: With the economy in the ditch, there are concourses of starving actors just begging for a gig. Make their day by offering to buy them dinner in exchange for playing a murderous psycho attempting to get into your house. Make sure to use some cheap black makeup to give your psychopath dark circles under their eyes, and check a thrift store for anything resembling a straight jacket for them to wear. After scratching on the windows for a bit, have your actor friend storm into the house wielding a weapon, then excuse your friend who most likely will need to use the bathroom.

I hope this article has sparked some creative ideas of your own, thus enabling you to create a memorable Halloween without resorting to the usual defaults. Also be sure to keep on the lookout for the revenge which will most likely be executed upon you after carrying out some of these ideas. Enjoy the season of dread!

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